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Randolph Carter (dream eternal)

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[13 Mar 2002|04:28pm]
[ mood | mellow ]

Well, we all knew it would happen. Sooner or later I'd fall out of the habit of the daily update. I thought it'd be a bit sooner than this, really, but sometimes I astound even myself... let's see. What's been happening since the fourth? Ooh, turns out Gilit isn't dead, she had some net connection problems. So, that's good to hear.

I decided I'm going to Georgia Southern with Melissa, an RA friend of mine. I stress the friend part. We'll most likely be rooming together - going apartment hunting in the summer. I managed to download not just one but all six separate La Blue Girl movies, of which the third is allegedly the most horrific. I have yet to see it myself - I've been too busy burning them for greedy friends. Not that I mind, really, but I like saying that.

I rolled once about..two weeks from..some time in the future. Either this Friday or the one after that. I guess maybe it was a week ago this Friday but..wait, no, that..that doesn't seem right. It'll be two weeks ago this Friday. That means I'll probably be doing it again either..the Thursday or Friday before spring break. I'm not sure which. I guess it'll matter upon which day someone's around to talk to me for an evening. I like dancing and all, don't get me wrong, but I really prefer talking. It's a better use for it in my opinion - though at some point I'll spend just a night or two dancing. Not the upcoming Thursday or Friday, by the way - my spring break starts on the 21st, I'll be at home on the 22nd up until, like, April 1st. Take note, people - come visit me!

I'll probably be hanging with the home crew any day I won't have out of towners visiting..Melissa won't be coming up, I don't think, she's staying down home with Robin, though I've promised her we can get here up here and work on an edgy look for her. It doesn't really work well in the 'dosta but I think she could pull it off with enough blue and purple makeup - give it that kinda frosty thing, you know? Her hair's short enough. She'd look like an Aveda model. I told her this but she's never seen one (?!). Are they not pictured in every salon or even just plain hair cuttery? Alarming.

I'll be stealing a dining tray this evening for someone and then selling it to them for $2. Not only do I win on the dare side of the bet but I also get money! It's fantastic. It has also led me to the conclusion that I should be stealing the silverware and other things like bowls and small plates - fuckers charge me like two dollars for a grilled cheese, about time they started paying me back in tableware.

I'll be qualifying for Hope next year, so that means I get to either horde my money or waste it. Seems like a plan to me. I downloaded Decks And Drums And Rock And Roll (Propellerheads album) and it's pretty cool...Kyle's advised me to look into this guy named Bonobo who's apparently related to Amon Tobin or something, so that seems extra-rad. I was only able to find one track but I'm sure diligent effort will turn up more. I realized this is the CD that Ari used to have, and we listened to..it's -ancient-. It's also spurred me to look into some Corky and the Juicepigs to see if any of that's around. Those guys were weird. A cursory examination has revealed the only gay eskimo song and the pandas must die. The latter was rad. The former wasn't theirs, I don't think. I was hoping for the routine with the Canadian game show hosts and the Torsos for Tots foundation..oh well.

I hunger for sustenance, so I think I'm forced to cut this short..but maybe I'll be good and update again later.

1 dreamer| close your eyes...

[04 Mar 2002|01:22am]
[ mood | excited ]

Oh, wow. I just reloaded. That smiley icon for bored is just THE hot shit, isn't it?

close your eyes...

[04 Mar 2002|01:21am]
[ mood | bored ]


Which Action Star Are You? Find out @ She's Crafty

Oh. As if there was any doubt. Yeah, sure, the questions are rather leading, but still. God damn. I can't wait for the next movie to come out. I've been waiting on Indiana Jones 4 for like..what, four, five years? I saw it on the cover of a Blockbuster magazine or something when I was in middle school. Go figure.

I've decided I like funk. It was kind of just a thing I had noticed in the past, but it's definite now. I especially like things that make the wah noise. Mmn..

I've been pretty tired lately. Some friends of mine have been fighting amongst themselves; it's not really my issue so I'll try and avoid commenting. Better to be neutral like the chocolate-wonderland of Switzerland. Or is Sweden the one with chocolate? Hell if I know, I guess. Watches, chocolate, pope-guarding and gold. What a life. Weird country.

I'm tired and so very bored. I wish something would explode outside.

close your eyes...

[02 Mar 2002|02:53am]
[ mood | sleepy ]

Okay, okay, so I'm lousy about updating. Blame the world for not being exciting enough.

Anyway, a friend of mine's in town from the 'burro (Georgia Southern) and I'm trying to find my friends who used to go there to introduce him to them, but no luck so far..he'll be in 'til Sunday, though they might be at home near Vidalia. I'm not sure. I try not to find out anything so when I do discover it it's a surprise.

I'm getting better at giving massages. I guess this is good. It seemed newsworthy, at any rate. I tried to dance to bad music and failed. Ho-hum.

I went to a friend's birthday party last night, that was also fun. There was free pizza, which makes it better. Also lots of toilet paper and balloons and laying around and exfoliation. We cut open two glow sticks and painted another girl with them. It said non-toxic, so I suppose it was okay...well, it didn't say non-toxic, but the OTHER glowsticks said non-toxic, and hell, if it glows, how much more different could it be, y'know? So we painted her, and stained her top some (it glows in the day, even, it looks awesome!). Anyway, I was later assaulted and brutally shoe-wedgied, so I bit her arm. Worst mistake of my life. Glowstick tastes like SHIT. Live and learn, I guess.

I'm kinda tired. But I'd feel lame going to sleep so early. I need to see if I work tomorrow, but at least I'll have the whole evening free... I haven't played on Armageddon lately, which makes me feel bad (it's been like two, three days) since I have an obligation to others/plot, but I've been so tired/not in a roleplay mood that it's difficult.

I'm never going to learn to play the harp since I'll never be able to afford one.

Autumn is the best season ever, and it's much better to say Autumn than Fall.

I'm tired.

2 dreamers| close your eyes...

[27 Feb 2002|10:56pm]
[ mood | happy ]

Heh. The RAs in my hall threw a social of cupcake-making. I told one of the RA's, a friend of mine, that I'd get another friend of mine (ours) in the face with one for $1, so I make this cupcake with 'nilla frosting and put a big green dollar sign on it, go outside, and tell him that I'm being paid to hit him in the face with a cupcake..BUT, if he gives me TWO dollars, I'll go and hit the guy who wanted me to get him in the first place.

I run inside, smack the RA in the face, get smeared in MY face with a cupcake (messy but fun), and now I'm two dollars richer. Whoo! Some bitchy girl sassed something out of her cake-hole about us being immature, but at least we're not so busy trying to pretend to be something we're not (adults) we don't have to suffer through the end of our youth without any more fun. I'm happy.

close your eyes...

[26 Feb 2002|11:59pm]
[ mood | mellow ]

Yeah...well, whatever, I guess. I've given up being pissed about it. I've asked the people I could, done what I can, and what's done is done. What's there left for me to do? Obsessing and being angry is stupid. Money's only money. It'll come back, and all I do for it is sit at a desk.

Positive things have outweighed negative ones...I got my shoes, made a couple new friends, three on campus, one over here. I made her a new default portrait from my brand new (and free) copy of photoshop. Aren't I just overwhelmingly special. Payday's in a week or two, or something..so who cares, right? I'll just be more careful in the future and be glad I wasn't robbed by the police.

close your eyes...

[26 Feb 2002|09:08pm]
[ mood | enraged ]

Well, well, well. Guess what's missing? My ecstasy. How much? About three hundred dollars worth. I keep them in this tiny little pill bottle, with other pills. The other pills are there. Mine are not. Something, I dare say, is amiss.

I like to consider myself a calm person, but I'm pretty sure I'm sitting here trembling with uncontrollable rage, deep down. I guess I'll have a talk with my roomie when he comes in tonight. I..am not sure. I do not really suspect him. More one of his friends. But it's still his fault. We'll see.

close your eyes...

[23 Feb 2002|10:05pm]
[ mood | excited ]

So last night was pretty awesome. I went out to this graveyard around midnight to play with the Ouija board. It moved of course, and enough people got scared that we had to leave. That was okay though, as we then went to some haunted street where a dead child is supposed to push your car uphill.

This is unfortunate, because an engineering student and I sort of ruined it; we saw something amiss and so we did some rudimentary physics calculations and took a level and measured and, well, it was simply not all it appeared to be.

Tonight, however...we're going to this out in the middle of nowhere bridge where a bus full of children ran off the edge, and everyone died. It is supposed to be haunted, and because it's a bridge it is perennially misty. We will use the Ouija board there. I'm probably misspelling Ouija, but..everyone knows what I mean. This is going to be cool.

3 dreamers| close your eyes...

[22 Feb 2002|08:48pm]
[ mood | aggravated ]

My Hot or Not rating is terrible. I think it's because I'm pale. Everyone wants blondes. Blah. I happen to enjoy looking ghost white, thank you. Ho hum. I work tonight from 10-12. Two of my RA friends are just going to get roaring drunk and play monopoly in the lobby. Should be an interesting shift. I checked on harps. They're about four thousand dollars. I'm thinking maybe I won't be playing a harp for a while. What can you do, eh?

close your eyes...

[22 Feb 2002|05:15pm]
[ mood | determined ]

I've decided I would like to learn how to play an instrument. A long time ago I wanted to learn how to play the guitar, but that was kind of fleeting and I later decided something like the keyboard or a synthesizer was for me. I never got around to it, though...and keyboards were really expensive to a twelve year old kid. But now..now I know what I want.

I would like to learn how to play the harp. Nobody knows how to play the harp. I don't know any harpists, and I think not only would it be incredibly cool to be the only harpist I'm aware of, but the harp is also an incredibly beautiful instrument, and the more I think about it the more in-tune with the aether the harp seems to be as far as music goes. It's..well, aetheric. Floaty. I realize that a nice harp is going to cost me somewhere around, oh..I dunno..$1,300 perhaps, but that's what I'll spend my first excess check on next year. Muahaha.. look out, world!

close your eyes...

[22 Feb 2002|12:16pm]

I Will Die of Natural Causes.
Your choice of life style has enabled you to live a nice long life.. To eventually die of a stroke, or was it a heart attack.. Either way you out lived just about anyone that gave a shit about you anyway.. Congrats

Find out how you will die, Take the Death Quiz now!

I knew I would outlive all you bastards out to get me.
close your eyes...

[22 Feb 2002|12:01pm]
[ mood | annoyed ]

So, I go to Customatix to check on the order status of my shoes, since I think they'll be arriving today. Much to my elation, my UPS tracking number has disappeared - they've arrived! So I go down to campus mail, and they're not there. Huh? I check with Customatix and give them my order number so they can check on where they are, and the guy goes, "Uhm...yeah, for some reason, they stopped in Alaska. Let me give you a call back once I figure out why they're there." Alaska? God, UPS sucks.

close your eyes...

Holy shitcakes [20 Feb 2002|08:28pm]
[ mood | intimidated ]

Well. I hate for this to be the only entry for the day, but though I was going to say something at least vaguely important or important sounding, this destroys it. My mind is blown. See for yourself.

1 dreamer| close your eyes...

[19 Feb 2002|03:30pm]
[ mood | pissed off ]

Hey. Turns out that mescaline? It's not mescaline. What I had interpreted were simply microdots are instead ecstasy LACED with mescaline. My friend here says that'd be super, even better, but I'm not so inclined. Though he says it'll just be a happy, cheery trip, that's not really what I wanted.

I'd like the ability to not have to worry about damaging myself like I do with e, and I don't want to have to deal with waiting in-between for it to even be any good. It's probably a mediocre dosage of mesc at best, it's not like you can make lots of money putting other drugs in a drug and then selling it for the same goddamn price.

Personally..I'm kind of peeved. I wanted to really experience it in its true form and not with the interference of other chemicals. I don't want it to be -tainted- by foreign mind-altering substances. I'm not AGAINST drug combination, but, goddamn it, that's not what I want. I want to take something and just have it be pure. Is that so much to ask? Bothers me..

I fear something's getting to me. I felt very in-synch with the world today, on a harmonic note. Like every step I took was a deep, rich, earthy chime that reverberated with the earth's natural rhythms. Not like I actually perceived it like that, I mean, that's just the best way I can describe it. I felt very in-tune with the world. Like if everything has that frequency at which it shatters, I was flowing along the same tone as the earth's. Attuned. I find it very pleasing, a calming sensation, almost Zen-like, but it also concerns me. I wasn't always like this and if it's a result of experience and exposure to foreign substances, then it's something I need to be on my guard about.

2 dreamers| close your eyes...

[19 Feb 2002|03:26pm]
[ mood | listless ]

DisorderRating
Paranoid:Moderate
Schizoid:Low
Schizotypal:High
Antisocial:Moderate
Borderline:Low
Histrionic:Moderate
Narcissistic:Moderate
Avoidant:Low
Dependent:Low
Obsessive-Compulsive:Moderate

-- Click Here To Take The Test --



Woo. Aren't I just choc-full of average. Oh well. I think it's more interesting than those, "What kind of trash can are you?!" tests. Hey, it's something.
close your eyes...

[18 Feb 2002|08:39pm]
[ mood | hopeful ]

Well, I'm procuring some mescaline. I think it's going to be a really interesting experiment..I'm going to be doing it either Friday or Saturday. Friday would be ideal, but I think I might like it in the afternoon..so perhaps Saturday after work. I'd like to get some sandalwood, myrrh, or some other pleasant smelling incense, on sticks, go out to a less-frequented spot, and just meditate and commune with nature. That's something I've never done before. LSD has always been a very different experience for me, and though I realize it's able to beautify earth I look at it as a very man-made substance, whereas I feel mescaline might somehow be different, something earthier, more natural.

If all else fails I'll simply do it in my room, but I'd feel semi-stifled..as if I weren't doing all I possibly could. I'll be sure to write about it in my journal, of course, but this is also a whoooole week in the future, almost. Today's only Monday.

On other notes, I took a History re-test today. Nothing makes you feel as awesome as when you take a test and know you got an A. Except maybe sex and other awesome things. But it's a different kind of awesome. ... Anyway, that was a pleasing end to my day, Political Science was really nothing-doing. I'm really looking forward to this weekend. I feel this is an avenue that could really open up new paths for me philosophically as well as spiritually. It's a good potential for growth. I have high hopes.

close your eyes...

[18 Feb 2002|04:39pm]
[ mood | complacent ]

I Am A: Neutral Good Elf Bard Mage


Alignment:
Neutral Good characters believe in the power of good above all else. They will work to make the world a better place, and will do whatever is necessary to bring that about, whether it goes for or against whatever is considered 'normal'.


Race:
Elves are the eldest of all races, although they are generally a bit smaller than humans. They are generally well-cultured, artistic, easy-going, and because of their long lives, unconcerned with day-to-day activities that other races frequently concern themselves with. Elves are, effectively, immortal, although they can be killed. After a thousand years or so, they simply pass on to the next plane of existence.


Primary Class:
Bards are the entertainers. They sing, dance, and play instruments to make other people happy, and, frequently, make money. They also tend to dabble in magic a bit.


Secondary Class:
Mages harness the magical energies for their own use. Spells, spell books, and long hours in the library are their loves. While often not physically strong, their mental talents can make up for this.


Find out What D&D Character Are You?, courtesy of NeppyMan!



Whee. I would've anticipated chaotic something but I guess Lady Eris can't be with us ALL the time.

close your eyes...

[18 Feb 2002|10:48am]
[ mood | tired ]

What a morning. I hate Mondays, particularly the part about them starting. Alarm went off at who knows when, and I can't count the number of times I hit sleep. Somehow I managed to get up by 8:00, and make my way to Palms (dining centre) to get breakfast. I did, of course, forget to bring my own supply of Cinnamon Toast Crunch, so I was left with the daunting task of procuring morning sustenance from french toast and an ample supply of blueberry muffins.

It's very cold today, on a side note. Certainly cold enough to warrant some form of, oh, I dunno, long sleeves and jeans that aren't riddled with holes. This is something I'll be sure to take note of for future classes today. Definitely a day for my army jacket.

Not that I'm in the army. It's actually an air force jacket. Or BDU's, or something. I got it at a thrift store, with oodles of other neat things for such a low price. God, I love thrift stores. So much cool stuff and for the small tradeoff of it not being new you get it for under a dollar. I can't even begin to explain how cool some of the toys I've found there are.

Anyway, morning. So History starts and he says the make-up test is this morning. I think that was just to terrify people, since it was scheduled for 6:15pm tonight. We didn't actually take it but there was a great deal of horror and shock. Heh, shock shock horror...anyway. We wound up working in our study groups to study the test, though by number 26 the professor (whom I think is really cool) came to sit and talk with our group for a while. Somehow we got onto the topic of drugs and I gave an impromptu lecture, and to my surprise he actually supported many of its principles - something I think is pretty rad coming from an authority figure.

After that ended and he gave the option of a bonus assignment spawned from our discussion, time to head on to English. The assignment was, by the way, to research cocaine, heroin, and marijuana usage from 1800-1937.

So, English. Sit in there for fifteen minutes with the rest of the class, I hosted an impromptu haiku contest against me and this one guy, who was terrible. The other guy who I think hates me (he looks like a mix between Reggie (see bottom left) and Elvis) wrote a haiku for him that was pretty good. I was about to top it when some guy who went for a coke announced that we didn't have class. Turns out some bitch from the office came down here, looked into the room, SAW THE STUDENTS, posted a note on the wall saying class was cancelled and then left. She didn't see fit to notify any of us. God, I can really get pissed at people sometimes. How unnecessarily crapulent of her. Oh well. Time to relax before Political Science and Sociology...

close your eyes...

[17 Feb 2002|10:17pm]
[ mood | enthralled ]

Right, right, I know. This is far too many updates for the number of hours I've clocked. But still. I couldn't in good conscience let this pass my audience by. It's simply too amazing for words. Unspeakable almost.

1 dreamer| close your eyes...

For the love of god, help [17 Feb 2002|09:43pm]
[ mood | anxious ]

Okay. This needs some serious input. You know that thing on the playground, it's round and metal, and you get around on it with other kids and spin around and around in a circle. What's it called? Not a merry-go-round, that's the one with the horses and things, and it's not a ferris wheel, that's the one that goes way up at the fair...so what is it? Nobody I know can remember. God, help me.

10 dreamers| close your eyes...

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